So first month in of the year 2014 and I feel much better. So to get you guys started I’m gonna tell you a bit about my last year and how it changed me not only as a person but how it hold in many big changes in this young girls life.
- I had just graduated from high school and didn’t get to school where I applied.
- Unemployed person I started to seek jobs and found one as a part time cleaning lady. I spend every other morning cleaning the spaces of local H&M’s clothing department and rest of the time I spend planning my new startegy to get into school that spring. Everything seemed so good and I’ve just started to workout with free weights for REAL.
- I split up with my long term bf and found myself a new job as a secretary for a property management agency. This month was a big blurr to me.
- Started playing Red Dead Redemption and totally lost myself in it.
- And actually manage to participate some kick ass parties with my friend
March – April 2013
- I singed my new job contract till the end of the August – TADAA, I was a sales assistant at local real estate agency
- Started really focus on my up coming entrance exams for spring – Pharmacy and Physiotherapy
May – June – July 2013
- Kept working out hard, reading and going to work everyday. At work I was 8h, then spend about an hour to work out and couple hours reading to my exam. I was exhausted.
- Entrance exam was really hard and failed the Pharmacy one. Physiotherapy went good, but didn’t got in – I missed four points in my total to get in….
- Started worrying about my up coming fall – job situation, could I move to live on my own?…
- Animecon, trip to Kotka, then the Kotka’s Maritime festivals with my ex and friends
- Got my job contract continued by a year
- Got my own apartment and moved in it at 15.8.2013
- Started planning about entrance exam for that fall
- Started a bulk
- Met someone, who turned out to be a really special person
- Started getting ready for a new exam
- Started having problems at hip and neck. I had this problem with moving my head and swallowing food. Nothing big yet, so didn’t give it much of a thought.
- Went out with my dear girlfriend and had an awesome night at the town!
- Bodywise – I looked the best I’ve looked at October. Seriously. SO DAMN CLOSE to have had ripped abs.
- The hip and neck problem got worse. Went to a doc, got it sorted out. by December.
- The most hectic and stressful time at the job. A lot of overtime, dinners and meetings. Almost 0 workouts. Feeling really bad. Thank god I was on the bulk.
- Had “black Christmas” and new LoTR Blueray box and Despicable me Blueray yay ^.^
- Had an awesome New years eve with three of my friends
So there you have it in a nutshell. What a year it was loads of ups and downs – mostly downs – but hey, I made through it! Now all of this is in my past and I’m heading to year 2014 full speed. I already listed my top 3 things for this year but for reminding myself I’ll do it again:
Saerwen’s goals for the year 2014!
1. STAY HEALTHY AS POSSIBLE
2. Get in to school – finally
3. Lose some fat and get my bf around 20%
4. Live life
Someone who has read my blogs before notice that I added one. Yes. LIVE LIFE. With all these pains and rough rouds I’ve learned that no matter what I need to find myself a time to relax and just understand that I can do what I’m about to do and be fine with my past. The last part ain’t easy trust me guys. In my life have happend so many things in such a short time that many says to me that I’ve already live almost one lifetime with my problems. But I’m not gonna settle. Nope. Even though I have questioned my reasons to get up early to go to work I still do it. It gets me forward. Because I can do it.
Now let’s all hope that this year brings me a bit more joy and luck than last year, because sure as hell I’m gonna fight for them!
I want to remind all of you awesome people something. Even though we pursuit these awesome, fit bodies, I wish to people to understand to look through the outside barrier when it comes to making friends and getting to know someone. Sometimes the most beautiful thing is wrapped inside this shell that doesn’t do justice on it.
I’m lucky. I have so many variety of friends that I can wish for: tall, short, fit, voluptuous, smart, geek, rocker, emo… Even have a few friends with a disabilities and they rock my world everyday. And I thank all of them for being who they are. Even though we wouldn’t get a long with all the subjects and things we discuss, I still like them a lot. They are awesome, way cooler than their outside form and we can agree to disagree things and still be friends.
“That’s always seemed so ridiculous to me, that people want to be around someone because they’re pretty. It’s like picking your breakfast cereals based on color instead of taste.”
Sometimes even the smallest gesture can make your day. This happened to me today:
I went to buy my meds at the local drug store. I have had pretty awful two days so far. From the moment I saw my pharmacist I felt good. She smiled at me, told me “Good morning” and did some chitchat which usually doesn’t happen here. Trust me. I was amazed but smiled back, handed my prescriptions and KELA card. She was so bubbly through the whole process. She told me that she’s gonna go and fed the meds and I just nodded and look at my watch.
Oh there’s so many things to do…
Then she came back and started putting those label things on the bottles. Then suddenly she asked me: “Are these you’re only drugs for RA?”
I looked at her and said “Yes.” She smiled at me back, this really wide smile and told me “Oh! That is so good, isn’t it?”
I was so baffled by her smile and the reality that she threw at me: Things could be worse.
I nodded and said yes. After a little silent moment I told her that many of my friends have the biologic drugs and they are whole different category to mine.
“Oh yes they are. So expensive and everything. But if this suits for you and it doesn’t ’cause any side effects it’s great! Glad that it’s working with you.” Her kindness made me feel stupid. I must have looked when I came to her station like the whole world stinks. And she was happy and kind towards me, even though my hard shell that I had put on me.But she changed it. I smiled. Smiled for the first time in days. I felt good although I had the stress banging my head with hammer. I paid my meds, thanked her and left.
Be nice to someone. Smile. Care. It can seriously make someone’s day.
This morning wasn’t my best. Car broke down just before I needed to go get my blood work done. Thank God my mom was at work and she could drove me there. Now gonna wait for the night and floorball practice, yay! Finally kicking butt to my flu.
I prefer winter and fall, when you feel the bone structure of the landscape. Something waits beneath it; the whole story doesn’t show.
Had pretty bad day. Didn’t get any sleep last night and the whole morning went by me looking at it from the passenger seat. Although got some squats done, it was pretty much that. Let’s hope that next week brings me more WO’s and smiles.
The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire.
There is an electric fire in human nature tending to purify – so that among these human creatures there is continually some birth of new heroism. The pity is that we must wonder at it, as we should at finding a pearl in rubbish.
Heat cannot be separated from fire, or beauty from The Eternal.
Stay strong guys and let’s kick some butt! : )